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Mailbag

Posted by on April 20, 2012

We get a lot of mail here at Weird Proof Headquarters, and while we try to respond to all of it, the sheer volume is overwhelming!  But since we love interacting with our many fans, we decided to devote a day to share some of the most intelligent, perspicacious, and flattering mash notes we’ve received since we began blogging.  Though the letters occasionally reveal a less than perfect grasp of English grammar, spelling, and punctuation, their passion is undeniable.

As always, these are actual emails from actual readers.

 

In response to “Dust Jackets”: “As I web site possessor I believe the content material here is rattling wonderful , appreciate it for your efforts. You should keep it up forever! Best of luck.”  —Viagra Online Aceld

Why, thank you, Viagra Online Aceld!  Your kind words are much appreciated.  Sometimes we doubt whether our work is “rattling wonderful,” or if we should keep it up forever, but with your encouragement, we will be sure to try!  P.S. You too are web site possessor?  Congratulations!

In response to “Good Ambiguity and Bad Ambiguity”: “Wonderful post but I was wondering if you could write a litte more on this topic? I’d be very thankful if you could elaborate a little bit more. Cheers!”  —BUY CODEINE

We will do our very best to elaborate a little bit more on that subject, BUY CODEINE, just as soon as we finish the complete set of liturgical candles we’re making out of our own earwax.

Also in response to that same piece: “I was excited to find this site. I need to to thank you for your time just for this fantastic read!! I definitely loved every little bit of it and I have you book-marked to look at new things on your site.”  —Handmade Jewelry

A Weird Proof convert for life!  We loved every little bit of you reading it!  Be sure to ‘like’ us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter!  Also check out the gift shop for branded Weird Proof coffee mugs, key chains, coffins, latex fetishism paraphernalia, and framed LOLcat posters.

In response to “My Testimony”: “Wow you website really good. Value I to see the hope can with. Very often I come and see you through any new story is my greatest happiness ha ha a little humor. Thank you oh”  —Monster Beats By Dr Dre Studio Michael Jackson

You’re too kind, Monster Beats by Dr Dre Studio Michael Jackson!  All of us here at Weird Proof HQ like to think our “website really good” too.  And we assure you that Team Weird Proof will not rest until the whole world also feels that each new story is their greatest happiness.  We think this is an entirely appropriate response to our stories.

Monster Beats by Dr Dre Studio Michael Jackson is one of our most devoted readers.  He’s posted at least a dozen comments, all about “My Testimony.”  On another occasion, he wrote: “Super-Duper blog! I am loving it!! Will be back later to read some more. I am taking your feeds also”

Fans of Weird Proof like Monster Beats by Dr Dre Studio Michael Jackson will definitely want to purchase our forthcoming book, Satanic: How the Liberal Media is Concealing Evidence of a Super-Advanced Pleistocene Aryan Culture.  Look for it this Christmas from RaHoWa Publishing.

“My Testimony” has proven to be one of our most popular pieces.  “TY a ton for posting, it was very informative and helped tons.. Hello webmaster I like your post. great.”  —using facebook for marketing your law firm

You flatter us, Mr. using facebook for marketing your law firm!  “My Testimony,” an anti-story consisting of a series of absurd and surrealist non sequiturs, was indeed very informative.  By the way, was that you who asked for our autograph outside Weird Proof Headquarters, in the balaclava and “Nubian Princess” T-shirt?

Also on the same piece: “The post seems awesome and it really is seriously informative about the best way to find discount Digital Pianos, many people will certainly delight in reading it.” —Digital Piano Reviews

All we ever asked for in this life was to disseminate information about the best way to find discount digital pianos.  There is truly no higher calling.  The number of people who will delight in learning about the best way to find discount digital pianos is without limit.

“Consistency is the biggest difference between clients who get results and those who dont, joe or pro. Having a goal and something to work towards makes all the difference in ahering to a training program.”  —Balsamic vinaigrette salad dressing prices

A little off topic, Balsamic vinaigrette salad dressing prices, but still some good advice.  What was our goal?  To help people make informed decisions about where to purchase their next digital piano at low, low prices, of course.  Mission accomplished!

And finally, simply: “augural”  —aha bls certification classes

Well, who can argue with that, aha bls certification classes?  In fact, guess who was voted “Most Augural” for Tijuana Remedial High School’s class of ’98?  Yours truly!

In response to “Topical Humor”: “Wohh precisely what I was searching for, thanks for putting up. web hosting| cheap web hosting|”  —best webhosting

No problemo, best webhosting.  Glad we could be of service.  Be sure to show your enthusiasm for Weird Proof by encouraging—and, if necessary, coercing—your friends and family to purchase Weird Proof licensed lunch boxes, jackalope pelts, earthquake repellent creams, and high quality stainless steel medical equipment including scalpels, forceps, retractors, and osteotomes.

And finally, in response to “Mr. Bokchito,” there was following cryptic message: “louis vuitton replica walletshttp://replicashop.org/ – louis vuitton afterdark replica”  —replica shop Undiz

Wow.  Just wow.  Those are some powerful words to live by, replica shop Undiz.

Keep the letters coming, my friends!

 

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